All the news the New York Times "forgot" - to print

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

"It looks to be a boisterous finish indeed!" Joe Buck bombastically said...

It looks to be a close and exciting race going down the stretch. It would be good to see America’s team win and the Sox’s finish penultimate in the wild card race… and there’s no second place spot in the wild card. To put it in less grandiloquence terms, I want the Yank’s and Tribe to win spots, and John Kerry’s team to be left home to ponder the sayings of the Zen or something… Most of you probably won’t know this, (and if you do, how come?) but I was born in the Aviation state, Ohio. And I was there to root for them in their finest hour when they had Jim Thome, Kenny Lofton, Matt Williams, Manny before the hair…etc. Those days seem antediluvian now, but as a neophyte fan it broke my heart to see them lose the World Series (1997). It would be great to see them win one. Maybe this year…

But going back to John Kerry’s team. Who knows? Maybe if they skip the postseason this year they can rebuild their image from being a normal ostentatious, happy go lucky ball club to a more iconoclast team. Perhaps a stiffer, tough guy, don’t you dare step across our plate type of team. Sort of like the Pittsburg Pirates… You know, they should hire some 300 pound’s plus guys to guard the plate against incoming slides. Maybe the obstreperous David Wells could be the official spokesperson for the team. Make everyone shave their heads bald (?). Dump Joe and Jerry and replace them with Japanese log racing sportscasters?…


{Not eveyone enjoys the baseball season}


Or make them NSRL sportscasters… You of course I’m sure know that NSRL stands for National Snail Racing League. It’s a nation wide sport which some ‘top’ (as in “We have top men looking over the ark” IJatLA) sports commentators swear by as the hottest sport in the country, and for that matter around the globe…

For the record: For those of you that think I am a baseball fanatic, let me tell you some enlightening news. For this whole baseball season, I have wasted less then 3 hours watching the Sox or Yanks on the tube. In this ere, that must be a world record…

5 Comments:

Blogger _|\|_ said...

Now that depends on what you consider a "waste"...

Wednesday, 28 September, 2005  
Blogger Tash said...

Well that does depend on your definition of "waste" I suppose. I for one think that for the most part, watching baseball it is not a waste of time. I was not using the word judiciously I suppose.

I hope I did not encumber any of you with my florid style of writing today’s post. I believe that the piece was ameliorated from its former morbid state with the fancy vocabulary. I hope you will show forbearance to me as I prepared for my SAT’s…

Test Day“AWWwwwwwwwwwWwwwwWWaaaa!!!! NOooooooooo!! NoooooooooOo!! Not the SAT’s!!!! You can’t make me go!!”

Wednesday, 28 September, 2005  
Blogger DJ said...

Suck it up Tash! :) Get ahold of yourself man, nobody's died, yet...

Thursday, 29 September, 2005  
Blogger Prince Caspian said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

Friday, 30 September, 2005  
Blogger Prince Caspian said...

The dog must be a Yankee fan...

Friday, 30 September, 2005  

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