The Last Battle

The True Chronicles of Narnia

From a fair and unbiased point of view
Aaaaa… Yes I am worried. There’s been a monkey thrown into our logging expedition in the newly acquired area of Narnia. Everything was going so well, almost too smoothly. Everyone was so strangely cooperative. Whenever we would ask our trade agent (an ape, it’s hard to find anyone in that area that will work with us.) to get us this or that, all he does is take his friend, a donkey, and dress him up like a lion. He parades him around, and all the animals obey him. Very strange… well anyways this ape got a contract for us to log some of the woods near our border with them. I had a bad felling from the start about involving my self with them [Narnians]. I hate their repressive regimes, where all because an animal can talk it is seen as on the same level as man. Simply revolting! I’ve done my part to try to straighten them out. I gave them a loving queen who loved her subjects so much that she let them stay in her palace all day without asking them to leave. In fact apart from her being overthrown she would have let them stay forever. I gave them a kindly king who kept stability in the empire by keeping the animals in their rightful place; the dinner plate. I’ve tried everything! Every single plan I’ve made though has been fouled up by a bunch of kids and a lion. Four kids actually, nobody knows where they come from. All we know is that their trouble makers. The lion is called Aslan, though he’s nothing to worry about. He’s so old that the joke is that he saw the world when it was first created. He’s done. He’ll bite the dust soon, mark my words. I have a bad feeling about the kids though. What if they were to come back…?

Going back to the logging story, the reason we had been logging was because lord Tarkamoon wanted some lumber for his new (and 13^th) palace in Carsornoon. He said he had every thing under control, and I granted permission. This morning just after the city gates where opened, a messenger came from the work area with a report of a murder. Apparently one of the groups had been attacked by a crazy man and a horned horse. Two of the loggers were gruesomely killed. (My heart goes out to there families…) Later in the day I received news that the attacker was none other then Rummert, king of Narnia. He surrendered to some of my forces peacefully with his horse. (The horse will most likely be put to sleep). This changes everything… Perhaps this is an opportunity to finally take Narnia... The conditions are perfect. No king, the country is split over our logging - and this Aslan, and I hear that the dwarfs are unhappy with the situation in which they live… Strike while the iron is hot… “Captain Reeeeettuu!” I roared.

The captain ran into the room and fell prostrate to the floor. “Yess myyy lordd?” he said shaking in fear like fish out of water.

“Give the message to commander Tissunaman to deploy all horse men, foot troops and battle horses to Narnia. And tell him not to leave anybody behind. I want this to be the last battle.”

To be continued…