Unreal Sports transcript 8/14/08

UnReal Sports with RuMeem Max

Host: “Welcome to Unreal Sports, I’m RuMeem Max. And tonight for our guest panel on their lives and sports we have 2008 presidential hopefuls Senator John Kerry, Senator John Edwards, Senator Hillary Rodman Clinton, and Senator Joe Biden. Glad you all could be here. Starting the questions with John, I’am sure people are dying to know; what’s your favorite team or sports moment.”

John Kerry and John Edwards: “Are you talking to me?”

John Kerry and John Edwards: “Sorry”

Host: “John Kerry please, sorry.”

John Kerry: “Hmmmm… My favorite team or sports moment, hmmm… Do I have to go first?”

Host: (host nods yes.)

John Kerry: (searching in suit pocket for poll sheet). “Oh! Found it. My favorite team is any team in Florida or Ohio; especially the Ohio State Wolverines. And my best sports memory was sitting in the Fleet Center watching the Boston Bruins defeat the Buffalo Sabers in the 2005 NHL World Cup Super Bowl. It was such an uplifting moment for me. The reason I love sports.”

Host: “Thank you John. John two, it’s a mystery to most people as to if you even care about sports. Prove us wrong, enlighten us.”

John Edwards: (nodding with vigor) “As yous’ alls knows, mys farther was a mills worker whos workeds days ands nights tryings tos protects his family froms starvation."

Host: (nodding mournfully)

John Edwards: “My father, loved tos watch football whens evers its was ons, ands hes was not working. Ones ofs the most vivids memories I haves ins mys minds today froms my childhood is sittings arounds thes TVs watchings intentlys as Joe Montana threws a home run to Tim Brown ins thes 1976 super bowl. Just rememberings thes moment brings tears tos mys eyes.”

Host: “And your favorite team is?”

John Edwards: “The AFL Ambulance Chasers.”

Host: “Hmm, thank you John; and we will be back in a moment with Sen. Hillary and Sen. Biden on UnReal Sports after a word from our sponsors.”