Beat the Press transcript April 20 2005

Host. ''Welcome to beat the press, our guest today is Silas ---------- former blessed leader and chicken farmer. Silas glad you could be here.''
Silas. ''Thanks, I always enjoy being on this show. It feels like home.''
Host. ''haaa haa it should you been on here sooooo many times.''
Silas. ''ahh yes.''
Host. ''Ok first question, do you support the brutal clubbing of baby seals?''
Silas ''I will take that question too mean do I support the killing of baby seals?''
Host.'' Yes, correct.''
Silas. '' Well in most cases no. I support it only when mothers life is in danger.
Host.'' So your saying you support the the deaths of baby seals! For shame, baby seals.
Silas.'' But I d---''
Host. '''--Next question. Will you run for Teenpact president?''
Silas.''ammm.. Yes I will I feel I can lower myself to do that. And do you know why?
Host.''Why?''
Silas.'' Because today is a day for leadership.''
Host.''Ok.''
Silas. ''Yes, their is a clear battle between good and evil. Right and wrong, betwe-
Host. ''just hold it a second, who are the so called ''good'.''
Silas.''Oh thats me, and of course my party PIG[ progressives in Government] as you know we cause unity. Because of our support of each others pork.''
Host. ''So then who is the so called ''evil.''
Silas.'' Saddam and G.A.P.''
Host.'' Who is Gap.''
Silas.'' Girls are perfect party. They threaten the stability of our country , the freedom of our nation, and their also unconstitutional.''
Host.'' Wooooo there. From what you just said their worst then the commies, right?''
Silas.''Right on.''
Host.''Ok don't move because when we come back where going to learn more on how grass grows!''